1. Declare yourself to be a contribution.
2. Throw yourself into life as someone who makes a difference, accepting that you may not understand how or why. (p. 59)
The idea of asserting that you are in fact contributing to the lives of those around you in a positive manner washes away the fear of failure. The applicability of this concept to us as Master’s students is compounding daily. I just have to keep reminding myself that I am making a difference in my student’s lives and that seeking this degree has positively impacted my teaching style. I cannot get bogged down in the financial aspect of this and know that because I am actively seeking to contribute positively in life, the purpose will become clearer as I continue to strive to better myself.
Zander’s father is quoted as saying, “I discovered a person cannot live a full life under the shadow of bitterness. (p. 64)
This statement resonates with me more than anything I have read in years. I often see my life as a series of failures, rather than acknowledging the growth and progress made in who I am as a person. Living under the shadow of bitterness from decisions made when I was younger still plaque my ability to “let it go”. Recognizing that I cannot enjoy my life as I should until I find a way “give myself an A” and admit that I am doing the best that I can, has been an eye opening revelation. I do not have to compare myself to other people in the program, because I am doing the best that I can within my circumstances.
Don’t take yourself so serious! Remember Rule Six!! (p. 79)
This is going to be my new mantra for the people in my life that I love that freak out over the smallest things and truly sweat the small stuff. However, I will acknowledge that there are many moments in my own life when I will need to apply this to myself at that moment. What exactly am I referencing you may be wondering. I know I seem so calm and even-keeled; however, those who really know me would attest to that statement. Example: I can lose it so quickly over my daughter pouting a little too hard because she didn’t get her white leggings, since the store only had black. And I mean lose it!
When I should be saying, “Really? Donya, really? Do not take yourself so seriously! Remember Rule Six!”
Thos I love sometimes need to hear that the thing they are currently stressing themselves and you over really isn’t that big of a deal. But how do you do that effectively without hurting the person’s feelings?
Example: I have a friend who feels like its her job to change the structure of the current city policy on that refuses to allow restaurants to have an outdoor seating area that is not covered. While I agree with her and stand with her when I can, she takes it absolutely personal when I don’t attend a meeting she asks me to come to last minute, expecting me to change my plans to go. Or there have been times when I’ve tried to help out and she has snapped at me because I haven’t done enough. How do I address this and help her understand hoe to apply Rule Six to her own life?
Zander, R.S., & Zander, B. (2000). The art of possibility. Harvard Business School Press.
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